Bye Bye B

I knew it was time. In fact, it should have happened long ago. But I couldn't let it go. I loved it - its look, its feel, and most importantly its symbolism. But, it's finally happened. The binky is gone.

From the time Brielle was born, she has had a binky in her mouth. We bought them in huge amounts so that we could have one in every room, in every diaper bag, at grandma's house, in the van, etc etc. She NEEDED one. And it reminded me that I still had a baby. But her teeth are so bad (seriously....really in need or orthodontia already at 21 months). I made a vow that January 1st was the day. And it was...until about noon. And then it was nap time and I caved. She asked for her "B". And even walked over to the cupboard where we keep them and reached up. And looked at me expectantly. And gave me the most beautiful wide gap, buck tooth smile that I had ever seen. I couldn't say no. I gave in. She slept peacefully.

A month later it seemed as though the gap was ever so slightly wider. I made the decision and was firm about it this time. It was a Sunday. After church we came home, had lunch and then I announced that it was time for the little girls to have a nap. Brielle asked for her "B". She walked over to the cupboard and reached up. She looked at me expectantly and then gave me her most winning smile. And I stood strong. I told her "No!! B is all gone!!" She looked down at the ground, then up at me and quietly said "K." She then went to bed for the first time in her life without her binky. I waited for the screaming, thrashing and temper tantrums. They never came. And now, almost a week later, the temper tantrums still haven't shown up. Who knew that it would be this easy??

I, on the other hand, am really missing B. I loved the way she looked with it in her mouth. Loved the sucking sound that she made with it. Loved knowing that as long as she had a binky, she was still a baby.

Moving on from one stage to the next is hard. I've been fighting having to close the "baby chapter" in my life for the last year. But, if diapers are the next thing I get to give up, I think I'll be okay.